Saturday, 30 March 2013

a proper youth trauma


Art Burshy is an open-minded man, and he is happy when he sees his children speak their mind.
But he is now getting a bit tired of his son, complaining that Art has always been such a bad father.
That this has created difficulties for the son to normally behave with others, as his father is such a freaky, socially corrupted, extremely vulgar, cynical loner.

And Art does understand somehow; he himself still frequently speaks about how his childhood has shaped his existence. His role in the family, the role models that his father and mother gave him, and how he dealt with difficult situations, under pressure.
He still observes that the way he acts and reacts in case of issues is linked to the odd way he felt and behaved as a child.
There are some moments he really remembers:
- how he would fight with his brother, who was much stronger than himself, and how he then took revenge, making a crazy caricature-cartoon of his brother... and then his brother just found the drawing very funny, corrupting the revenge
- how he developed his humour to deal with tricky situations and tension between his parents, being the clown
And many things more that make Art have flashbacks combined with emotions.

But whenever he talked about his experiences with his parents at a later age he discovered that the events that he thought were very big, heavy, emotional and burdensome...his parents even did not remember...
He wondered how that was possible...and his son now mentioning this sh*t to Art brings back all these tiring memories.

Art read some books on raising children, and it is amazing that after so many years that humans are walking on this planet, and so many times they have raised their children, that still ideas of raising kids vary soooo much...
and it is very funny, but by the time his kids are getting almost adult he feels he starts to understand.
About how the purpose of raising kids is not to have them sit nicely at a restaurant table, like some book about French kids states...bullsh*t.
Or too religious ideas about guilt, sin and keeping your kids away from evil...hell no, they need to learn to make their own mistakes...
He feels more that raising kids is about respecting them, being there to help them become adults that can live a meaningful and happy life, learning to make their own choices...
And actually that is quite difficult, and there is no secret recipe for raising happy kids, and anyone telling you it is simple just doesn't grasp the depth of the challenge.

At the same time Art has observed that all the negative experiences from his youth have also been important in driving himself as an artist, pushing himself, finding direction, making him dive deeper for inspiration... and actually he feels he would not be at the same place, with the same insights without these things having happened. He even sometimes pities people that grew up in a 'happy' family...my God that must have been boring...and these people must live mediocre lives.
It seems that many famous people and successful business people had a terrible youth, so this could mean:
a) you need to be somehow traumatised to truly be driven to reach success, or
b) it is much more interesting when you are famous to talk about a terrible youth, then to say it was all so jolly happy, or even
c) famous people are just a random statistical group, implying that almost everyone ends up having traumas about their youth, like we always take the worst experiences as a sort of reference and emphasising how special it has been that we have reached our success...

So, Art wonders whether he should tell his son all these thoughts and reflections, but his son will definitely not want to listen anyway...
So, Art decides to tell his son that - if he wants to be famous - it is actually quite good to have a proper youth trauma...

Saturday, 23 March 2013

Inspiration is overrated

So, Art got up, he has to make a new painting for his next exhibition...in fact he needs to make 5!

It all started so great, being invited for this great exhibition in Chelsea, the current walhalla of art in the West of New York.
And when they asked how many art works he would want to have in the show, he enthusiastically said '6 should be fine'...
That was around 6 months ago...
And here he stood, in front of a plain white canvas...with lowest energy ever...
He was angry...but angry for what...and angry on who?
- for the shining white canvas that looked at him, giving him way too many options
- for the loads of ideas he has, but of which none seem really to inspire him now
- for the bloody gallery that kept sending mails, reminders, checks etc, pushing his creativity in their structure...bastards
- for himself basically being way too optimistic
- on his incontinence not being able to keep his mouth shut when being enthusiastic
- AND his ego that just took over for 5 seconds
- for linear time, that passed by so quickly...bloody Einstein saying time is relevant...what a bullsh*t!
- for inspiration that always evaporates when time pressure increases
- for all the distractions and his inability to resist and focus...

Yes, quite an impressive list of things and people to blame...and of course deep down he knew that it was basically himself that was the root cause of all this...but he did not want to hear now, he just wanted to be grumpy.

And he knows the theories about inspiration and the key guidelines:
- find a clear direction for your art works, where you want to go
- limit yourself, just take 2 colours and 1 subject
- and start the journey, exploring and adjusting, each time refining your art work
But he felt already too tired to even select 2 colours...

So, what to do?
He actually felt like taking a nice beer, maybe the alcohol would free him...well, he knows that alcohol does not help the quality of the work...
Or just throwing some paint on the canvas and go 'Pollock'...
Well, he was sure he would find something, and he know he would in the end be on time, but he also know it would be last minute intense stress and no sleep for a few nights

While thinking of all this he started walking to the drawer where he kept his paints, he sighed...slowly preparing the canvas...and a smile came on his face...why did he somehow always have to go through this phase...?
Anyway, inspiration is highly overrated..!

Saturday, 16 March 2013

so you want me as a mentor

It happened this week.
A young artist approached our friend Art Burshy.
The young man showed Art some of his beautiful art works
And just at the moment that Art wondered what the talented young man wanted from him...the question came...
"would you please be my art mentor?"

Art was completely flabbergasted
Silence
    while Art was thinking...
   Was this a joke...?
           What could he possibly teach this guy?
       How did the boy find him?
               Why did he choose Art as a mentor?
  There must have been better artists available? More famous, more influential, more connected, more sane...?!

Art had never been a mentor and wondered what the key role would be of a mentor.
Sure he could give it a try and teach this talented creator one or two things:
- he could be cynical about the boys art works, stimulating him to prove himself
- he would be happy explaining why he (like many others) would have a 0,0001 % chance of being successful
- and if successful he would have 0,001 % chance of making a living of his art works for a longer period of time
- that 80 % of the art works never reach the price they get sold for; so not really a safe investment for buyers
- show the destructive effect of alcohol on the art work results
- how to successfully grow a lack of inspiration
- he could in fact explain a lot of what he knows that doesn't work;
   - how not to make main stream art
   - how not to please the audience
   - how not to have a consistent portfolio of paintings and a distinctive personal style
   - how not to make enough paintings to satisfy your agent
   - how not to spend time marketing and selling your art

Art had been silent during all these reflections, and the face expression of the young man had become less optimistic, in a sort of silence, afraid to breathe, while waiting for Art Burshy to react to his question.

Art decided to challenge the young artists motivations: "why me?! a dysfunctional, grumpy, lazy, cynical and mediocre artist..?"
The boy was persistent and actually seemed to know quite a bit about Art Burshy; his paintings, his concepts and recent exhibitions (the last not being so special as Art did not have a lot of exhibitions the last years).

Anyway, in the end Art actually got inspired, and he could see himself working with this young and enthusiastic 'pupil'.
Not necessarily teaching him a lot.
But maybe more focusing on some key questions that probably any artist should answer on his personal path:
- what does my art mean to me, what makes it so relevant, and how can I make it more relevant
- what is the purpose of art;
- what is good art, and how does it differ from beautiful art or aesthetics
He would need to find his own way anyway, and it was clear he had talent and skills...

And Art actually felt energy coming back...
And sure, Art did not have all the answers; he did not have the illusion to understand the purpose of art.
But somehow this student gave Art himself a renewed purpose, which was quite inspiring - that is, after the initial cynical reflexes that have been carefully nurtured over the years.

Sunday, 10 March 2013

Art is not a game

Our friend Art Burshy is definitely not a fan of games; especially games one plays with family. If you ask Art about it he will probably tell you:
- basically these games are a waste of time; there is no purpose, just spending time, nothing gets created, nothing meaningful gets added to life
- also these games he finds utterly boring, even more so when not all players have the same level and you are assumed to politely avoid completely crushing your opponent.
- worst are the games largely based on chance: rolling a dice and watching how lucky you get...basically no challenge to the brain and very annoying to lose without having influence on the result.

Well, in some occasions he can be convinced by others to play, and in most cases this is when his kids want to play. He understands that in such case it can be quality time spent together, but really enjoying it? No, not really (or actually 'really not'), he will almost see it as a personal sacrifice.
So, during these games he will - in his mind - try to think of more important and meaningful things:
- new ideas for art concepts
- which colours to take for the next layer of his newest artwork in progress
- reflect on the latest pages of a philosophical book he has read
- thinking back about moments of joy and excitement with his wife
- issues he faced at work last week

And then, being a bit distracted he sometimes discovers he is actually losing the game, for example to his son today playing chess.
That makes it even unbearable, and while fighting not to be upset, he desires to throw the chess pieces in the air, walk away and stop the game.
In an ultimate effort to control his anger he starts explaining his son that these games are no good, they add nothing.
And his son has seen this before, and actually he had seen it coming, so he just puts it out there ' this only seems an issue when you are losing'.

And actually Art will have to agree, indeed, it only happens when he loses.
And maybe this aspect of losing is a stronger element of why Art does not like to play games.
Maybe Art is deep down extremely competitive, and he can not deal with losing. And he even can't stand letting kids win....

Probably a good topic to develop into a new art work for Art.
Or would it also be a waste of time to make art about playing games... ;)

Sunday, 3 March 2013

what if your art will not sell...

Art Burshy has a storage for all his art works.
By now he has made so many art works that they do not fit in his house.
And of course Art does not mind to completely fill up his house with art works, but recently even he faced reality; it was impossible to move between rooms in a normal way.
Actually, some rooms were so full that he needed to move art works before being able to enter.
And with the family growing he felt the need to store all and create some space.

It was nice, as everyone was surprised to rediscover all the space that had been hidden for so long.
And also Art discovered that his atelier was actually quite spacious; really inspiring.

And now Art sometimes sneaks out of the house, towards the storage...it feels like going to the royal chambers filled with treasures...he enjoys to see all his art works properly sorted and labelled.

This time he invites his son, hiding his pride, and showing him the treasures he has created.
His son is impressed with the way his father has cleaned up their house.
But when Art mentions the enormous value being stored, not even directly thinking of the financial value, his son frowns.
And he comes with a philosophical reflection:
"Sure, if you will be famous it will be worth a lot....
if not... we are stuck with a lot of chemical waste"

And Art opens his mouth, wanting to reply, explain his son he is wrong...
But then Art realises that actually his son might be right...

Silently they leave the storage, they go back to the house, and Art takes a bottle of beer, opens it, and without taking a glass drinks it all from the bottle...he falls into the couch and switches on the tv
All inspiration lost for the day, well, tomorrow there's another day...