Managing expectations

Today there was a new employee joining the team of Art Burshy.
The young man had trembled when entering Art's office... what would this day look like...who is this bearded guy wearing this hat throughout the day...is this really my manager...
At the same time, in awe... so this guy Art Burshy is a real MANAGER, wow

Art Burshy observed the impression his office and presence had on the youngster.
His direct reaction was to lower expectations and destroy the admiration part:
"I am part of the lowest scoring 5% of managers, just to manage your expectations..."
I was a bit puzzled when Art Burshy told me today, although hardly anything surprises me anymore coming from this eccentric guy...

Art explained me that:
- it is known from psychology that some people increasingly 'admire' their bosses
- they develop a dependency-relationship, meaning
(a) the employee does everything for his boss and
(b) the boss protects his employee from anything negative
And this often only ends with a big implosion of trust, (i) when the manager leaves or (ii) when he has to take actions that hurt the employee in some way or (iii) when he for once does not live up to the employee's carefully built expectation level...
That's why Art manages expectations from the start.

Another thing you see is the psychological desire for the manager to be recognised by his team as the 'hero'.
To maintain this hero-status he will ensure to be owner of all successes.
And whenever he does not get things done - he just blames the rest of the organisation or even the clients.
He blames other locations, politics, incompetence of others etc.
Basically he steps away from the table where all decisions are taken and projects himself and his teams as victim of the angry outside world.
It is better as a manager to manage expectations, and admit where you can influence and share success, rather than claim it. And to participate constructively in decisions accepting it might impact your team.

In the end also a manager should make a choice how he wants to manage and how he sees his relationship with his team. How much does he share personal information, how often does he join them for drinks.
Art's guideline is:
- treat all employees equal and with respect
- avoid favouritism
- and when employees get too positive > point out that you are just doing your job, and success only comes as a result of a good collaboration.

Sure, short term it brings you less adoration and ego-satisfaction, but those things you should invest much energy in; you better invest time at home with family and friends ;)